Should I Like It?

I wrote most of the songs on my album before I actually had my incredible encounter with God 12 years ago. So while my songs are indicative of my 12-year journey, I believe that they were given to me as a picture of hope for my future. They were certainly not a reality at the time but they became my reality. This cannot be truer than for track 10, ‘Should I Like It?’ In fact, I thought I had written this song about God invading my life (I laugh as I write this) and how it made me feel so uncomfortable but realising that He was there to stay. Well… when I look back now I realise that this whole song had nothing to do with God and was actually about my husband, Joseph. 

I remember the day Joe decided he was going to marry me. He took me for a drive in his brother’s black Chrysler and as we were whizzing down the motorway he told me that I was the one. I didn’t even know the guy that well so I was completely shocked. Joe had come over from Pakistan to attend Bible College and I was teaching Worship Lifestyle and Team Building in the college at the time. No, we didn’t date while I was his lecturer but he did (as it turns out) secretly have eyes for me. Anyway, as we drove further down the road, I told him that we hadn’t even gone through the five levels of friendship (cannot remember what they were). Besides, I had just broken up with someone and there was another guy was showing interest in me and then Joe rocked up on the scene.

When our church leadership caught drift of this, I was told I had to have nothing to do with guys for a season. I mean, I was the worship leader, leading a creative team, teaching in the college and working in the graphic design department of the church. I was meant to be setting a good example but actually, I was hopelessly failing. To be honest, I was very broken and I was a mess and yes, this was before I encountered God in such an awesome way. Nevertheless, I fell in love with Joe and still saw him secretly until I was urged to own up. I finally did and we then went on a two-year break. It wasn’t meant to be two years but I went on a healing journey and I didn’t want to be distracted by a relationship with a guy. Before our break, however, I did urge Joe to wait for me and to fight for me (during the time when we weren’t meant to be seeing each other). And you know, the thing that ultimately convinced me that he was the one is that he did just that. He waited for me, fought for me (I said yes the fourth time he asked me to marry him) and he finally won my heart – it took him two long years. I had told that Lord that all I wanted was a man with integrity (who said what he did and did what he said) and Joe is exactly that. I had been in relationships with guys who made empty promises that left me very empty too.

God is so faithful. Not only is Joe a man of integrity but he is also so loving, kind, caring, compassionate, faithful, is as solid as a rock and has supported me in fulfilling every single one of my dreams. Plus he brings me coffee in the mornings! What more could a woman want! I waited (what seemed like a long time) for Joe and it was so worth the wait.

When we got married we had over 500 people at our wedding and reception. People still talk about how amazing our wedding was. It was glorious. The presence of God was so evident and our guests were from all nations and backgrounds. Since that amazing day, we have had three beautiful boys, Emmanuel, Isaiah and Nathaniel. We also have a baby waiting for us in heaven.  

When my boys now sing along to ‘Should I Like It?’ it does make me smile. They have no idea yet that it is the story of their dad and his unbreakable love for me.

Article originally published at A Step Forward.

Loulita GillComment